Sarah Blunden and Angie Willcocks’s The Sensible Sleep Solution is a refreshing take on helping mum and bub through those first few months. Blunden and Willcocks’s tips for getting a restless baby to sleep are moderate, tested and easy to put in place. Here, they give some advice on what to do if your baby won’t stop crying – and stress the importance of taking care of yourself as a parent, too! Also, ever wondered what colic actually is? Read on …

If your baby’s crying persists for days or weeks and there seems to be nothing you can do to soothe her, try the following:

+ Organise for your baby to be checked (again?) by a health professional with an interest in children, such as a GP, paediatrician, early childhood nurse, or allied health professional. If you don’t agree with something someone says or something does not seem right for you and your family you may want to get another opinion.

+ Speak with other parents about what might be going on.

+ Ask for some support from family, friends or professionals (or all three). Tell them, ‘My baby cries a lot for no apparent reason, no matter what I do, and I could use some help at the moment.’

+ Get some help with household chores. (See Part 3, Taking care of yourself.)

+ Take a break from your baby by organising someone to look after her for a while.

+ Think ahead – this baby will not always be a crying baby. Before long she will be starting school!

It is important to note that, while all parents are likely to find a constantly crying baby difficult, those with certain temperaments will find a crying baby especially difficult to cope with. Those:

+ who are used to pleasing others and making others happy, who hate upsetting people or ‘letting people down’

+ who have difficulties putting up with strong or negative feelings (in themselves or other people)

+ who like to be organised and are used to having a fair degree of control over their lives (who now find that they can’t control this situation no matter how hard they try).

If any – or all – of these sorts of personalities sound like you, and you have a baby who cries a lot, it is especially important that you find supportive people to help you through this challenging time, either with practical help, or by listening to you talk about the difficulties you are facing.

Why would your baby cry a lot?

+ Temperament (see more about this on p. 25).

+ Persistent hunger (not getting enough milk for example). If you are worried that your baby is not getting enough milk and may be hungry please consult your doctor or early childhood nurse for advice.

+ Illness, pain, or discomfort.

+ Colic (see below for more information).

What is colic?

Colic sounds like a medical diagnosis that may explain what is wrong with a baby, but in fact it is a descriptive term referring to any baby who cries excessively for no apparent reason. Excessive crying is defined by the 3-rule: crying for at least three hours per day, three days a week for a period of longer than three weeks.

Colic usually starts around six weeks of age and stops at about three to four months (although it can continue for longer in some babies) and occurs in about one in five babies. All babies seem to grow out of colic by the six-month mark.

There are many theories around why babies are ‘colicky’: gas or wind in the bowel, discomfort due to particular foods the breastfeeding mother has eaten, food allergies or intolerances, and/or pain and discomfort from other sources. There are a number of products available based on these theories, including special dummies and bottles which claim to minimise the intake of air and medicines that claim to relieve the discomfort of trapped wind. Some midwives stress the importance of getting rid of wind after a feed in ‘colicky babies’ and others are of the opinion that excess feeding (as in short, frequent feeds) may contribute to tummy pains and an unsettled baby. If you have been trying frequent feeds as a way to calm your baby and it doesn’t seem to be working you may want to wait at least two and a half hours between feeds by using other calming techniques in between.

Talk to your GP or early childhood nurse if you would like more information.

To read more, you can find out about The Sensible Sleep Solution here. Please note, this title is also available as an ebook here.